The Dangers of INTERNET DATING

Sharon (not real name) was despondent. She had just been saved by paramedics who had succeeded in pumping out a whole bottle of sleeping tablets from her stomach. A 22 years old African, living in London, England, just a few hours earlier. Luckily, her mother discovered her almost lifeless body in the bathroom floor of their apartment, just in time. A few hours more, she would have died a painful death.

Why did she make an attempt on her precious life?

Why did she try to kill herself? She discovered that her sweetheart, the man of her dreams was “Phantom”. He simply did not exist. How could that be? She met “Him” the man on the internet, on a dating site. Unknown to her, mark (the Phantom boyfriend) was the creation of another girl. Can you beat that? They chatted for hundreds of hours over two years period on the internet and since “Henry” was supposed to be in Brisbane, Australia, it was understandable that they carried a relationship without meeting for two years. Sharon never got serial photographs of Henry, sometime in the view of web cam several times. Unknown to her, she was chatting with one of the male friends of Henry’s creator.

All over the world, Internet dating is fast becoming a fad among teenagers and young adult. Internet dating is especially attractive because the anxiety, uncertainties and lack of self-confidence that young people fell when meeting people of the opposite sex, face to face for the first time is completely eliminated through Internet dating. They do not have to worry about their looks, dressing, weight, skin tone, etc… hence meeting someone for the first time on the Internet.

Nigerian youths are not left out of Internet dating fad, about 80% of young people in urban cities like Lagos have e-mail addresses. A random visit to cybercafé in Lagos will show that about 70% of young people there are browsing dating site and chatting endlessly in chatting rooms.

Sharon’s story typifies the danger that young people are exposed to when they engage in Internet dating. According to recent reports, Law Enforcement Agencies in urban cities like London, New York and Paris now randomly issue warning about the dangers of Internet dating as fraudsters and criminals find the atonement it provide most convenient avenue for getting at unsuspecting young people.

What young people did not realize is that the traditional way of meeting potential date, i.e., face to face has a tremendous advantage. When you see some one face to face, it is easy to monitor things like appearance, tone of voice, body language, etc. you can easily spot warning signals.

But is Internet dating completely bad? No not altogether there are some good report and some testimonies from Christians who have met their future partners through dating sites. A couple shares their testimonies at the fountain of life church at Ilupeju, Lagos about how they met through Internet dating.

What young people have to understand is that it is senseless to completely forgo traditional ways of meeting friends even when casual friendship is the goal. It is use to meet the friend face to face, as soon as possible but in the company of at least old friends.

For Christians, there are few “Christians” dating site of the Internet, but most of most of them are foreign and many are suspect.

My advice to young people who frequent Internet dating site is this: read Proverbs chapter 7 before you visit that dating web site again. As the saying goes, a word is enough for the wise